When darkness invades my soul Pain permeates every fiber of my being Can I ever be made whole? It seems impossible to recover from this crushing blow I cry and weep and mourn what is lost It haunts every waking moment, like a never-ending nightmare, it seizes me, and won't let go I run from it, trying to escape it and be free But it chases me and hunts me down Then it drags me back, locks me up, and holds me in captivity How can I escape this prison? Oh, where is the key? I a

It's the time for fall harvest, colorful autumn leaves, fresh apple cider, pumpkin picking, candy, and costumes. I have loved dressing up in costume since I was a little girl. My creativity and imagination are always stirred when I get to choose who or what I want to dress up as, and then create a costume to bring it to life. I've never been a big fan of off-the-rack costumes. I love the adventure of going to thrift stores to find items that I can use to create costumes that

Every morning when I wake up, and every night when I lie down to sleep, I am keenly aware of my strong desire to control my life circumstances. I am also fully cognizant that some things are just plain out of my control. Uncertainty leaves me feeling powerless, and it drives me crazy! Sometimes I get chest pains from anxiety. My stomach feels queasy, my breathing is shallow, at times I feel lightheaded, and numbness grips my entire body. On the inside, my emotions are like an

Yesterday I came face to face with another lie that I've believed my entire life. I was first confronted with it almost twenty years ago when my counselor told me I must learn to set boundaries in my relationships. She explained that healthy relationships exist when there are clear boundary lines. I've only been brave enough to enter the boxing ring and duke it out with this lie occasionally. When I have mustered the courage to have a face-off and enforce healthy boundaries,

I was blessed to spend time with a dear friend on Sunday afternoon. She's the kind of friend that you can be real with and share your hurts, your struggles, and your deepest fears, and she still loves you. As it turns out, we're both struggling with debilitating doubts, insecurities, and fears. We are both in a place where we are being asked to lead others, but neither of us feels ready or capable to carry out that responsibility. Each of us shared that the reason we don't fe

The last two weeks have been exhausting. I am always amazed at the power of our emotions. They can zap your energy like a bad alternator depletes a car battery, leaving you immobilized. It is very easy to get sucked into the darkness of grief and allow depression to slither in like a boa constrictor ambushing its prey. It would be easy to allow it to swallow me whole. It would be easy to stay in bed and pull the covers over my head. It would be easy to leave all the blinds cl

As the Fourth of July approaches, I thought I would brush up on the historical facts of our country. I did an online search and was struck by the words that I read on Wikipedia. I know this federal holiday commemorates the signing of the Declaration of Independence of the United States on July 4, 1776, but there was something I read that resonated deep within me that I could not ignore. “The Continental Congress declared that the thirteen American colonies were no longer sub

June 11th, 2019. Today would be my 31st wedding anniversary. I never imagined I would be facing this day alone. I always thought Randy and I would grow old together. I am a romantic, so I envisioned it like a storybook ending... we would be holding hands lying next to each other and then gently drift off heavenward in close proximity. It seems nothing in life turns out quite the way we envision it. Those dashed hopes, unmet expectations, and shattered dreams can be very diffi

It is so easy to believe you are worthless when you continually feel less than. Do you feel like you never measure up no matter what you do? Are you unable to feel satisfied with your work because you can only see the things you could have done better? Do you constantly compare yourself to others, secretly wishing you could be more like them? Do you have thoughts that begin with “If only I was…” and you can fill in the rest with a multitude of things… smarter, prettier, thinn

A dear friend of mine gave me a beautiful pink hyacinth a few weeks ago. It has begun to bloom and fill the room with its highly fragrant scent. She gave this flower to me as a visual reminder of spring and all that it symbolizes as I begin this new chapter in my life. I love flowers and plants, but I have never had a hyacinth, so I did a little research to find out how to care for it properly. Besides learning the proper way to care for it, I also learned some other interest

Like a book, there are many chapters that make up your life. You may not like the chapter you are in right now and you may not be able to rewrite it, but you do get to choose how the next chapter is going to go. Maybe you can’t control the circumstances you will face, but you can choose to change your perspective. You can choose to change your thoughts. Remember, you are the author and pursuing your purpose will help you write your story. Last week a dear friend of mine gave

My number one goal this year is to cultivate a joy-filled life of purpose. Joy is not an emotion that just shows up magically, it is a deep inner sense of well-being that must be sought out. When life is going well, feeling joyful is not very difficult, but when brutal storms of life knock you down, it can feel as if joy is no longer possible. Last year our family was thrust into deep darkness as Randy was diagnosed with cancer. In four short months, this family had its pilla

With the beginning of a new year come thoughts of starting fresh with a clean slate. It is like having an opportunity for a do-over. It is a time to re-evaluate and set new goals. It is also a time to look inward and humbly accept responsibility for areas of our life that need a little work. Sometimes, if we are really honest with ourselves, we begin to recognize that some of our attitudes and behaviors towards others are less than stellar. If we are being brutally honest wit