Like many people, my children find it easy to honor and celebrate their father. Many fathers exemplify Faithfulness. They are Affirming, Trustworthy, Honest, Encouraging, and Reliable. May God bless you and magnify the beauty you bestow on your children.
However, this was not my experience. Father’s Day left me feeling empty inside for many years. Maybe your story is similar to mine and you can relate. How do you honor someone you are terrified of? How do you honor someone you really didn’t know and who really never knew you?
Fathers have a tremendous impact on our lives. The things we learn from them help shape us and how we view the world around us. It is a weighty responsibility to carry.
Some fathers are not able to handle the pressure and choose to leave. Some fathers choose to be distant. Some fathers are abusive. We are often quick to judge them. Many times, we allow roots of bitterness to grow into hatred because of the wounds that were inflicted on us.
Then I am reminded that they have a story too. Maybe their behavior stems from being deeply wounded by their father. Maybe the cycle has been handed down for generations. Maybe it continues because the wounds are deep and have never been acknowledged, tended to, and allowed to heal. If we allow bitterness and anger to remain in our own hearts, we will likely continue the cycle.
What is your story? What is your father’s story? What is his father’s story?
Knowing someone’s story often gives us a new perspective. It can open room in our hearts for compassion. I am not suggesting we excuse the behavior, merely that we understand where it comes from. When we understand where the behavior comes from, it is easier to forgive and allow our own wounds to be healed.
Everyone has a story and our worst behavior is usually rooted there. Finding compassion, forgiveness, healing, and freedom may be the best way, possibly the only way, for many of us to show honor and celebrate on Father’s Day.
Is it time to change your story?
May we uproot destructive cycles and plant new, fruit-filled legacies in their place.
Blessings & Happy belated Father’s Day to all fathers, may you be honored and celebrated!
Faithful
Affirming
Trustworthy
Honest
Encouraging
Reliable
“…my God is my rock, in whom I find protection. He is my shield, the power that saves me, and my place of safety. He is my refuge, my savior, the one who saves me from violence.”
“A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in his holy dwelling.”
“Trust in him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge.”