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  • Writer's pictureKelly Neff

When Darkness Invades My Soul

Kelly Neff Speaks - When Darkness Invades My Soul
Photo: Kelly Neff

When darkness invades my soul

Pain permeates every fiber of my being

Can I ever be made whole?

It seems impossible to recover from this crushing blow

I cry and weep and mourn what is lost

It haunts every waking moment, like a never-ending nightmare, it seizes me, and won't let go

I run from it, trying to escape it and be free

But it chases me and hunts me down

Then it drags me back, locks me up, and holds me in captivity

How can I escape this prison? Oh, where is the key?

I am bound up in darkness, its grip is so tight I can barely breathe

Oh Lord, I need you to set me free!

My heart is shattered, no peace can I find

My thoughts are filled with piercing questions and lingering doubts

Oh Lord, help me to trust you and renew my mind

I Am right here beside you, dear one, turn to me and look into my face

Trust me, my child, come close if you want to hear

My voice is a gentle whisper that can only be heard in a still and quiet place

The freedom that you seek is found by looking deeply into my eyes

I have already given you the key

To use it you must choose to believe the truth and rebuke the lies

What you focus on is what you will see

Where you walk is where it will lead

What you think on is how you will be

You have faced great suffering and difficulty

But I Am an awe-inspiring artist and if you are willing

I can take your brokenness and your ashes and weave them into a magnificent tapestry

Oh Father,

I looked away and lost my way, then stumbled and fell into a dark and bottomless pit

I am tired of running, I am empty and exhausted, and I am in desperate need of rest

Today I am intently looking into your eyes once again

I am quiet and still, so I can hear the whisper of your voice

I am nestling in closely beside you… and it is here I will choose to sit


Dear friends,

I have been in a very dark place for several months. I have been doing only what is necessary to survive each day. Today is the first time I have been able to write in many weeks. I am sharing this publicly in hopes that it will help someone else who is in a dark place right now.

I intend to begin writing again, as I believe it is something God has called me to do. However, I am just beginning to climb out of the deep, dark pit I have been in, so I will be taking it slowly. Thank you for your patience, love, and support!

My heart goes out to all who find themselves in a dark place. Know that you are being prayed for, you are loved, and YOU ARE NOT ALONE.


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